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Showing posts from May, 2012

Partners and Parents

I can't say it enough - it's all about communication.  I would like to share my musings about how it has been said you find partners like your parents.  My parents are both musically inclined; my dad being a little drummer boy and my mother a singer/piano player/accordionist extraordinaire.  They met through mutual friends and were in a band together called "The Lawn Chairs".  Awesome, right?  Indeed.  I was an 80s child born to wild, rockin' parents!

Ha, not so much.  My mother is a librarian and has been one for most of her professional life.  My father is a rather studious, bookish type, working in Graphic Arts.  I'm not saying they don't know how to have a good time, but they were definitely nerdy musicians.  Cool in their own right, but not hardcore rock and rollers.  My father is a little more distant in terms of communication, but he always expresses his love and concern for me.  He's more on the stoic side, but he definitely offers lots of adv…

Can't we all just get along?

I read an opinion piece from the New York Times about same-sex marriage the other day. It made my thoughts about life resurface. Why do people waste their time trying to make other people miserable? Does it matter what goes on behind closed doors? Isn't it ALREADY boring to talk about this?

The article tried to say that Obama did the right thing.  He is all for same-sex unions, but won't force States to change their laws.  I agree - he will not be able to convince all the old fart, conservative honky upper class types or the red necks or the Bible thumpers or any other ignorant types I may have left out.  He, as President of this "great" nation, is taking a stance.  He is NOT, however, going to spend all of his energy and power trying to fight something that many people simply will not accept.  But marriage in Massachusetts should be recognized in Texas. Yes, all you homophobes in Texas need to get over it.

This issue just seems so archaic to me. I grew up with homo…

Time is on my side

Looking back over time, I realize I have done lots of foolish things. I won't go into all the gruesome details (at least not now), but I tend to waver between believing things happen for a reason and believing in the total random, chaos that is life. Why did I react to things a certain way? Why do I constantly worry about each and every detail of my life? Why do I always want to strive for something better?

The only two significant relationships in my life were with men I met in the flesh. Not on the Internet. They taught me a lot, ripped me apart, made my heart swell, boosted me up and knocked me down, made me stronger and yet more vulnerable. In short, they helped make me who I am and helped me realize what I want.

I'm still involved in this relationship that has seen it's fair share of ups and downs, but I know I can't walk away from things when they get difficult and I have to take charge of my own life. I have learned so much. That fated day I met him almost a yea…

You've Got a Friend in Me

Over the years, I've learned that you win some, you lose some. People come and go in your life - some playing a starring role, others just playing Cashier #2 or Tall Man #1. It is impossible to make everyone your friend, it is also impossible to stay friends with everyone. You can be friendly to everyone (that I certainly am), but since variety is the spice of life, you're going to find that sometimes curry powder doesn't really go well with nutmeg. You can try your best to get them to mix, but it's not always meant to be. If you're someone like me, losing a friend would be a devastating blow to your psyche. But now I say, fuck it. I don't really care about trying to make things work. Beating the proverbial dead horse is, obviously, a waste of energy. I have a few people I will always be able to count on. That's all I need. Those friends will be there for life. They will be invited to my wedding (Ha! If I ever get married), they will always call me and I th…

Oh the irony

A few months ago, when I actually was training new employees (it's been a dry spell since January), there was a young man in the group who I thought was cute. The months following his training, I became frustrated with my job (the usual gripe - overworked and underpaid) and began a spell of slacking off. Seeing as though I was officially nothing more than an interpreter, I acted like one. I waited for phone calls and began developing a very close relationship with some of the interpreters in the back (I work in the front as part of the "administrative" team). The cute young gentleman was one of them. After a while, I realized he had developed a crush on me and I him. After my boyfriend dumped me, I threw caution to the wind and decided I would actually hang out with him and our other coworkers outside of work. One thing led to another and there I was, letting him give me a ride home one night and I may or may not have let him kiss me. Not a good idea. Not a good kisser. …

Shit happens

To my great amusement and delight, I woke up this morning to find an e-mail from my mother informing me that my dog Charlie (a 6 year old Bichon) had puked in my closet at 2:30am. When I called my mother to discuss our favorite topic - Charlie's late night fluid emission trips - I was actually LMAO. I put her on speakerphone so that my friend could be privy to the details and the full report was that at 11 he got up to pee. At 2:30 he puked in my closet. At 4 he shat. I might have even missed something...regardless, you get the picture. Fun night for mom.

I relayed this story to one of my best friends in Chicago and the phrase that popped into my head was "dog toilet". My room at home has been converted into a dog toilet. When I am at home visiting, I upset the delicate balance of my dog's bowels by confining his trips to a much smaller area. Does anyone wonder why I would perhaps think twice about living at home? Imagine bringing a man home...please be careful not t…

Pain in the Heart

The human heart can take so much. Lots of pain and joy and repeated kicks, cracks and beatings. I'm of course speaking (or rather, typing) metaphorically here. All perceived emotions come from the brain somewhere. The heart just keeps on pumping blood. What you want will never quite mesh up with what you get because most people, if not every human being, will always want something more. Being happy is not something you achieve and then you put it like a trophy on the shelf. It is a fleeting thing that you may have for a short while and then it flits away, returning at a time unknown. You can convince yourself you are happy or miserable - it's all a matter of perspective. I'm not trying to be zen or Buddhist or a hippie or anything like that. But most of the time, we cause our own "heartache". We are our own worst enemies. This is a rather sobering thought. If I can be master of my emotions, I will never lose. Days when I wake up and hate life are days totally was…

Playing Craps

Despite the title of today's post, it has in no way, shape or form anything to do with gambling or is a very Tina-like reference to my favorite disgusting topic. Just a warning...

How do you know if someone is right for you? How do you know if they're the one? There is, as far as I know, no way to look into the future or determine long term compatibility. Perhaps Miss Cleo would be offended, but there are absolutely no guarantees in life (a few cynics might say, false - taxes and death are guarantees). If you love someone, you have to take a few risks and work to keep a relationship alive and well. Relationships are never easy, especially in the long run. Two different people with different needs, wants and desires are involved. It requires a lot of work, but shouldn't be difficult or impossible or even stressful to make both parties happy.

All I want is to be happy. I think that's all anyone wants. You shouldn't rely on your partner to make you happy or expect the…