The Love Chronicles

Nobody likes to be played for a fool, least of all me. But I know we have all found ourselves in compromising situations in which we most certainly know we have been had. It is not fun; it can downright hurt. How do we avoid such situations without being overly cautious? How can we live in the moment but be true to ourselves? It appears to be a balancing act. If you take any two people and they randomly interact, it is very hard to predict what will happen. Every encounter would be finitely different from the next. However, some humans use their brains and some can make educated guesses based on certain behavioral patterns. An example would be if one meets someone they find attractive at the bar and both are under the influence of alcohol, they might be inclined to go home with each other. That is all well and good, and sometimes really is fun and in the moment, but the next steps tend to vary. Do the two people continue to see each other? Does it develop into something more serious? D...

The title of my post today is borrowed from a song of the same name written by Carl Perkins in 1957, which was in turn covered by The Beatles with George Harrison on the lead vocals. An excellent song in all of its forms. It also seems to fit my life right now. I'm "in between gigs", to quote my mother and not only are men from my past contacting me, I have met quite a few recently as well. No one has potential as far as I can tell, but I it is still rather ridiculous. Just today within the span of 3 hours, a man I met over a year ago from Germany (who still lives there) contacted me. He stayed with me for a few days in Chicago in March and we hit it off, but he lives there. I'm still here. Long distance clearly was not something he was willing to keep up. I started dating someone else in the mean time, but he would write to me on Facebook on occasion and tell me how much he missed me. He picked today of all days to repeat those sentiments. Then, just a few hours late...

All my exes live in Texas... Well, not really. My ex-boyfriends live in Illinois, Arizona and Germany, as far as I know. But those three places are a bitch to rhyme, don't you think? I will, for the sake of my readers, refrain from trying to make something catchy out those place names... Or wait, I might be on to something here... (*sing aloud in the style of a country-esque ballad*) One big bad boy Left behind in Illinois, Arizona, didn't want to know ya, Too many guys with no persona Germany, you were so bad to me Time to go on a dating spree Exes here and exes there, Don't wanna see them anywhere! What do you think? Not too bad, right? Leave a comment to let me know, or add your own lyrics! Musical fun aside, I have been in contact with several of my exes lately and I wonder why it all seemed to happen at the same time. Perhaps it is meant to remind me of the good times, but also to remind of what did not work in those relationships and why they are in...

OK, y'all...so I know this is cheating to post something from another website, but I read this entry from Refinery 29 about life in your twenties and thirties and thought it was somehow appropriate and applicable to my life and the lives of many of my readers. Even though it's the thoughts of 8 women, some of the things they say are spot on, so guys, listen up!  The overall gist is when you're in your twenties, you should be wild, have fun, try new things, really put yourself out there.  Don't go completely bat shit crazy, but live a little! This is the perfect time to figure out who you are.  Then in your thirties (or if you're lucky, even a little sooner) you can start laying down the groundwork for your future. I can finally say I've learned my lesson(s).  I've been wild, spent money with reckless abandon, drank too much, made rash decisions and now I'm ready.  Ready to do what it takes to make a nice life for myself.  I hope everyone has that momen...

Oh, the irony, my darling readers, of those chance meetings when you are least prepared. Let me tell you a story... Due to the lovely and very early arrival of winter in Chicago - snow! wind! below freezing temperatures! parkas! - I decided to stay the night at my mother's house who I had been visiting because biking home in such weather seemed rather imprudent. In the morning my mother mercifully offered me a ride to the Western bus stop, making my commute home much shorter and fulfilling her duty as a good mother quite nicely. It was early, but there were a few people waiting at the corner of Western and Roscoe, all dressed appropriately for the weather, except for your humble author. Let me describe what I was wearing: A navy University of Illinois hooded sweatshirt (it has the word "Illinois" emblazoned across it in bold orange lettering), dark blue leggings, brown mid-calf boots, teal green gloves, bags under my eyes the size of former Soviet Satellite States. By...

My dearest readers, there are many difficult questions we are forced to answer throughout the course of our lives. Am I challenging myself enough? Should I look for a new job? Am I really happy in my current living situation? Does this make my ass look big? I never thought I would have to answer such a question regarding blocking someone on my phone. But let me offer you one piece of advice: if you ever even have to ask yourself the question "Should I block this person or not?", then chances are, you probably should. I've never had to do this until recently, but I must say, it feels empowering. Not only are you, as the blocker, robbing the blockee the pleasure of being able to communicate with you via text or phone call, you are also causing the blockee lots of grief. Hopefully they are sweating bullets and up at night in complete agony because ALL of their calls go to voicemail and ALL of their texts go unanswered. The best part about this is, you will never know if th...

In a serious conversation with my friend last night, I realized something important and almost miraculous. My Crap-o-Meter is finally starting to work. It took me 8 years of relationships and dating to realize I don't have to put up with other people's crap, and frankly, I shouldn't have to. My first long-term relationship with my German ex-fiance (that's right, I was engaged) lasted 4 years. Lots of back and forth and on again off again behavior. My second serious relationship with a legally married man lasted 13 months (the divorce went through when we were together) - we also broke up once in the middle of the crap storm. My third serious relationship only lasted 8 months. And this last "relationship" I was in only lasted for about 3 months. For you visual learners, please see the chart below. It is adjusted for actual time spent dating, in months. The chart clearly highlights my growing inability to put up with crap. You should always demand the best, beca...