Fools Rush In

I have decided to permanently abstain from the online dating world after many attempts on various sites and bouts of boredom. However, some of my friends still wade through the bull in an effort to find a decent date. I sincerely wish them all the best. I can say that online dating may not have provided me a soul mate but it certainly provided fodder for my story bank. As I mentioned in my previous post, I meet lots of men out and about in the great city of Chicago so I don't get too bored for too long. I have been saved.

Today's post comes from a dear friend of mine: the lovely Ms. Patrizia. She has graciously allowed me to use her story on my blog because it's just too good.

The setup: Patrizia is a busy girl. She works long hours, works out, goes out - a typical, single 20 something lifestyle. She has an OkCupid profile and will respond to the gentlemen who have written her a well thought out message (one liners like "hey, beautiful" don't really warrant a response). If she has time, she will chat with a select few, but that is rare. Since she is busy, she doesn't always pay attention to her phone or computer. Occasionally OkCupid will be open, but she won't actively be on the site. You follow?
The guy: Bulgarian macho man type. Writes a certain kind of foreigner's English that has some mistakes but is not necessarily the endearing kind. Patrizia is willing to overlook it. He initiates the conversation. Patrizia writes him a few times. Not a whole lot of contact but somehow he takes the liberty of calling her "hon". He obviously wants to exchange numbers and meet her. It's clear that he looks at her profile a lot. She is more guarded and suggests they chat more before she offers up her number.
The issue: Patrizia left OkCupid open. It appears she is online constantly. She hadn't yet responded to one of his messages. She had every intention of doing so but he had beat her to the punch. This is what she found in her inbox...

Apr 14, 2013 – 2:07pm

U ARE PEACE OF SHIT, NOTHING EUROPEAN LEFT ON U. JUST AMERICAN CRAP... U DONT HAVE TO REPLY TO MY MESSAGES! EXCUSE ME DAY AND NIGHT I SEE U ONLINE, SO I DONT KNOW WHAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT?! U ARE JUST ONE OF THE MANY PLAYERS, BUT ACTUALLY ONE OF THE MANY WHORES.... SO GOOD LUCK TO U WITH UR FUCKERS, I DONT DEAL WITH FAKES!

This very sane, romantic message showed that he jumped to conclusions and wasn't willing to take a chill pill. If someone isn't jumping up and down at the opportunity to meet you, if you had a brain you might get the hint that they're not really interested. And otherwise, correspondence etiquette dictates that if you've written someone, you should just wait for a response. If they don't, then is flying off the handle really going to help your situation? Definitely not. Patrizia laughed it off and blocked asshead and reported his message. An appropriate course of action. No one should be badgered or guilted into meeting someone. Especially since you don't know each other yet, you don't each other anything except to be courteous and respectful. Not everyone will be honest and express disinterest, so sometimes you flat out get ignored, but to act like a jackass just gives sites and the users of such sites a bad name. I've had my fair share of horrific messages and it's a turn off on so many levels.

In any case, Patrizia and I shared some laughs and scoffs of disgust over this guy. What a fool. Control your temper and learn to wait. A pox on his house, I say! May he never find his true love or if he finds some poor soul may they both be miserable! As for Patrizia, be brave. They're not all bad. As for me...who knows?